Jesus wrecked my life

The title is a quote from Roe, a dear friend. It's how she describes her "coming to know Christ." And as of this week, I agree with her. If you really get to know (conocer-Spanish) the person of Jesus and just not a knowing of Jesus (saber-Spanish), he tends to wreck your life. The apirations and goals you wanted to pursue may not be as important anymore. The American dream may become a mere shadow. Jesus may call you to empthasize instead of sympathizing. You may be asked to walk down paths that personally you otherwise wouldn't choose. And unlike popular Christianity prescribes, giving monetarily won't be good enough. Pew-sitting Christianity will not point others toward the person of Jesus Christ. Action will be called for and hands will need to become dirty.....so, the question I leave you with is: what in your life is worth fighting for? Is justice worth fighting for?

Jesus People, USA

So, hanging out at Jesus People tonight. My fellow traveler is checked in for the week, and new friends have been made. One of the more interesting is Gordon. He is originally from Oregon and has been traveling around the nation for a time now. We had an interesting conversation. He suggested spending time at a monastery to clear my head and get some direction. Sounds like a great idea. My travelling partner is making friends with this cool group of "youth" (teens and 20-somethings). One of them is in a band and the music is quite good. Another is a teacher's assistant. A third is addicted to youtube and mypsace. In other news, there is a diverse group at JPUSA.

Spring Break

Spring break is officially upon us at my small school. Florida seems to be the destination of choice students said when asked their spring break plans. If not Florida, most are working at home or near school. Unlike my colleagues, a good friend and I are spending spring break differently. To empathize with our fellowman and better understand them as people, we're going to a nearby city to experience homelessness.

Brokenness--part 2

From Brokenness to Community by Jean Vanier:
"To love someone is not first of all to do things for them, but to reveal to them their beauty and value, to say to them through our attitude: 'You are beautiful. You are important. I trust you. You can trust yourself' (16).

Wow! Thank you to all the people who have done this for/to me. Thank you for being a part of my life, no matter how long or short, and walking with me through this journey we call life.

"Multi-Ethnic" week

Here at ****** we have experienced yet another week of “multiculturalism”, “multi-ethnic programs”, “diversity awareness”, or whatever you would choose to call it. Take your pick because each title is pretty much the same.

Yet, I believe that if we seriously desire unity within our community, Jean Vanier’s From Brokenness to Community helps to point the way. It does not and will not give us a formula to follow or a how-to but a deeper understanding of ourselves and our fellowman.

However, I must warn you, it will challenge you. It will stretch you. It will cause you to rethink yourself and the God we profess to serve. It will make you uncomfortable to call yourself a Christian if you are wearing a mask or doing the Christian life by quantifying your spirituality.

Vanier describes community but what got me was his concept of communion. He defines communion as "love and friendship"..."Communion means accepting people just as they are, with all their limits and inner pain, but also with their gifts and their beauty and their capacity to grow: to see their beauty inside of all the pain. In the relationship of communion, you are you and I am I; I have my identity and you have yours. I must be myself and you must be yourself. We are called to grow together, each one becoming more fully himself or herself” (16-7).

Knowing and loving people as they are, this type of communion and not community, is what we should strive for. Community is nice and good, but communion with one another–that would blow my mind. We could be a bunch of Jesus-loving, radical-about-people, world changers. And you ask, “How would Vanier’s idea of communion be possible?”

“We can only truly love people who are different, we can only discover that difference is a treasure and not a threat, if in some way our hearts are becoming enfolded in the heart of the Father, if somewhere God is putting into our broken hearts that love that is in God’s own heart for each and every human being ” (20-1).

It is by knowing people, first and foremost, with God’s love for them that will transform our community. And no matter how highly we think of ourselves, I know I’m not there yet. There are times I resist God’s love for others and its continual attempts to enfold my selfish, conceited, egocentric heart. And no matter how much I choose the weaker impulse (God’s desire for me to love my spiritual brother or sister), there are just as many times or more that I choose the stronger (my fleshly desire).

I'm Innocent, I Swear

I'm innocent, I tell you--even though right now, I'm feeling uneasy. And part of this is my fault. I told someone my secret a while back, and it has come to bite me in the ass. Not only does that person know but another friend also knows. I feel violated. It was my secret. If I wanted to share it, I would have. Because I think they both know, things are weird and I don't know how to handle the awkwardness. Hiding it sounds good but the desire is to not be a fake with people I've been real with until now. It urks me that the past seems to carry so much weight even if I don't want it to. I came to college as a new person and wanted to leave my past behind. I wanted people to meet and know me, not my past, parents, grades, or religious affiliation. Just me, and now I wonder...was that too much to ask?

Brokenness--part 1

From Brokenness to Community by Jean Vanier:
"It is people who are weak, rejected, marginalized, counted as useless, who can become a source of life and of salvation for us as individuals as well as for our world" (10).

Wow! That is so true. I learn so much from those I just take an extra 30 seconds to get to know. I mean it may just be a quick "Hey, how are you?" that brightens their day. I believe that's what Christianity's Jesus demonstrated. Jesus was so much more into detail than Christians are today. In today's world, we can become very "me" focused and very busy with stuff.

In the biblical story of the widow's two mites, Jesus took the time to notice the little things. I probably would have become impatient standing in line, dropped my tithe off, called a friend to let them know I was running late, and sped off to the next appointment in my day. Jesus intentionally sat and watched. I think we need to practice this more: sitting, watching, and interacting with those who the world might not see as valuable.

Valentine's Day Poem

i loved him
and
he broke my heart

i loved her
and
she threw it in my face

i loved them both
and
with no regret

for i believe God
and
love, he calls us to it

but like the man
in
Moulin Rouge

the greatest thing is to love
and
to be loved in return

God loves me
and
i choose to love him in return.

"Multi-Ethnic" chapel

A friend of mine asked me to read her thoughts before she posted them on the Wittenburg door at our small Christian school. I thought they were really good and want to share them with you:

I am writing to express my opinion about Chapel Service on Monday, February 12th, 2007. The description of this chapel in the given chapel guide was “Unity within Community: Faculty Perspective”. I believe the faculty and staff chosen by the Multi-Ethnic Services poorly represented the diversity of our campus. The faculty/staff presented in the following order: Professor Beth, Professor Derrick, Dr. Christian, and Professor Theodore. If we look closely at this selection, the racial demographics are as follows (and in this order of appearance): Caucasian-American female, African male, Caucasian-American male, and Black-American male.

The question that came to my mind was: Is this campus just black and white? And I pondered carefully, and the answer is: NO. There are students who can be represented by faculty and staff who are not Caucasian-American or Black-American. Here are just a few examples and the cultures they represent:
Professor R...........Finland
Professor M..........Spain
Professor W..........China
Professor M..........Romania
Professor S...........Indonesia
Krista W................Hawaii

Each of these faculty and staff has a story to tell, and they are neither Black-American nor Caucasian-American. They are from Europe, Asia, and the Pacific Islands.

This week, we are to “celebrate” unity within community. I urge you that it is not a white versus black issue. This is a campus full of life, of many different people, of different countries, and states within the United States. Skin color does not define culture. For an example: some people are from different countries but do not have that stereotypical appearance. Today's chapel, of a faculty/staff perspective, should have fully represented the diversity of the student body.

I urge you to look beyond skin color and ethnic background, for these two elements are not everything. I urge you to pay closer attention to the way people are inside, not outside. The old saying, “Don’t judge a book by its cover” applies in this situation and we can apply it [here]: “Don’t judge a person by their skin or ethnic background.”

I urge you to get to know other students, faculty or staff on this campus who are seemingly different than you. Look into their hearts. Look to understand what they think and feel and why they think and feel that way.

Here at ******, we have the privilege of experiencing a slice of God’s unique diversity through the many professors, faculty, staff and students represented. Unity within Community is about everybody, no matter where you are from. Every culture and race should be represented.

Bradley Hathaway: Manly Man

Hathaway expands my view of a manly man through his spoken word, and I am forced to rethink my definition *props to Roe for sharing this with me*.

Christianity: Be or Do

During a vespers service last week, the thought of Christianity being a chore came to mind. It seems in the little Christian community where I go to school, Christianity is about doing. If a person does the right things (reads their Bible, spends time in prayer, goes to a Bible study in their dorm, and participates in the various spiritual activities on campus), that person is definitely a good Christian and no one questions their spiritual status. However, it seems that other cultures emphasize Christianity as being. The practices of solitude, meditation, and silence are admired. It seems these are the measuring stick for Christianity and spirituality in general. Perhaps, the people in my Christian community should practice these virtues and see how Christianity continues and flourishes.


*Disclaimer: This may just be in my little conservative bubble of a school. Feel free to disagree.

Homelessness

Growing up in a small conservative community, I was taught that homelessness was the result of bad decisions. Circumstances or hard times may have contributed to a person's homelessness, but ultimately, it was choice. After doing research and "broadening my horizon", I would have to disagree with my upbringing. Homelessness could be the result of a layoff or huge credit card debit or student loans. Homelessness could be a choice (http://guide2homelessness.blogspot.com/). Homelessness could be the result of mindset and a vicious cycle. And that is what I would argue. It's mindset. A good percentage of the homeless may be victims of mindset. They could have been raised in poverty and it's the only thing they know. They could have fallen on hard times, wanted to pick themselves up, and just never had the opportunity. And once you've been down for a while, it's much more difficult to have the desire and want to "pick yourself up by your own bootstraps". Hence, my theory of the vicious cycle.

Motivation

The question of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation is one of great debate. The western value of recognition continues to dominate in our society. We recognize those who excel in sports, theater and academics. The media assists by putting athletes, actors, and actresses on (pedistools) for all to see. The eastern value of expectation seems to surface. Students are expected to excel in academics for family honor. Average is synonymous with failure and that's it. One cannot be average because it equates with failure, and failure is not an option. Is there any easy answer? Is one better than another?

Choice or Reality?

In Psychology, colleges and universities teach about the great debate of nature versus nurture. Wikipedia defines the terms like this: Nature vs Nurture is a shorthand expression for debates about the relative importance of an individual's innate qualities ("nature") versus personal experiences ("nurture") in determining or causing individual differences in physical and behavioral traits. With the development of human genetics, many important human traits have proved to be partially or mostly genetic.

The question that comes to mind is: are some issues nature but our actions a choice of nurture?

Margaret Cho: Asian Chicken Salad

So, this clip is soooo funny! I crack up every time I watch it. The awkwardness of people; dang, it's funny.

Secrets

Secrets. We all have them, and that one word seems to sum up my life right now. And the biggest problem or struggle is the element of fear. Christians are supposed to share their struggles with each other (Ephesians 6:2), but there is this schema in the Christians community that real Christians have it all together. I don't know about others but I definitely don't have it all together...in other words, the consequences of sharing my secrets are greater than the benefit of someone else sharing my burden. So, the only option is trudge on...alone. Perhaps one day, the rest of the Christian community will more accepting of imperfect people and more genuine with each other.